The Missing Pillar of Wellness: Why So Many Women Still Feel Disconnected

We're celebrating two years of The Healing Heroes Podcast.

In this deeply personal solo episode, Chandler reflects on what she's learned after more than 100 conversations with healing practitioners, courageous women, and our loyal listeners.

Along the way, one unexpected pattern began to emerge—one that changed how she thinks about healing, happiness, and what it truly means to come home to yourself.

If you've ever looked around at a life that seems good on paper but still felt like something was missing, this conversation is for you.

In this episode, Chandler shares the realization that's shaping the future of The Healing Heroes, and why it may change the way you think about wellness altogether.

What You Will Learn

• [00:08:01] Why every healing journey looks different—and why that's a good thing.
• [00:10:37] The biggest lesson Chandler discovered after two years of conversations.
• [00:11:08] The three relationships that create a meaningful, purpose-driven life.
• [00:13:08] Why spirituality deserves a larger role in the wellness conversation.
• [00:16:18] The subtle signs that you've drifted away from yourself.
• [00:18:03] Five ways spiritual disconnection quietly shows up in everyday life.
• [00:20:16] Why transcendence belongs at the top of human development.
• [00:22:23] What modern wellness still can't replace—and what's coming next for The Healing Heroes.

Let’s Connect!

Chandler Stroud

Website | LinkedIn | Instagram

Happiness Academy is now Healing Heroines, a signature space for women who are ready to feel more grounded, more peaceful, and more aligned — inside and out. 

Download a complimentary Healing Roadmap to discover our Past, Present, and Possible framework.

Want personalized guidance for your healing journey? Book a call with Chandler!

Mixing and editing provided by Next Day Podcast.

Transcript

Chandler Stroud: [00:00:00] Hey guys, before we dive in, quick question. Have you ever gone to bed completely exhausted, but your brain just won't shut off? Or maybe you felt that wave of anxiety where your heart starts racing before your rational mind can stop the spiral? That's exactly what led me to Lux Neuro, and neurofeedback has genuinely been a game changer for me.

Chandler Stroud: What I love most is that everything is personalized to my brain, and I train virtually from home while watching TV. The [00:00:30] biggest shifts for me have been better sleep and actually being able to access calm in my body. If you also experience anxiety, have a hard time focusing, sleeping, or simply want nervous system support, head to luxneuro.com to learn more and book a free consultation.

Chandler Stroud: And as a Healing Heroes listener, you'll get 10% off one month of remote training or counseling if you mention the show. Okay, now let's get into today's episode. Hey guys, [00:01:00] it's Chandler, and welcome to the Healing Heroes. I promise you I'm Chandler Stroud, an executive, wife, and busy mom of two, who after years of living with anxiety, health struggles, and an unshakable feeling like I should be happier, made a profound discovery that changed everything.

Chandler Stroud: Join me on a journey where unexpected paths lead to healing and [00:01:30] more happiness. On this show, we'll explore unconventional ways to unlock more joy in your own life with the help of my very own healers and trusted advisors, the Healing Heroes.

Chandler Stroud: Hey, everyone, and welcome back to the Healing Heroes podcast. I'm your host, Chandler, and I am so grateful and excited to be back with you today after our 12-week hiatus. As many [00:02:00] of you know, we decided to go ahead and re-release the entire first season of the show, primarily to bring everyone back to the basics.

Chandler Stroud: These conversations were the very first conversations that I had with all of my heroes before the show even began when we launched back in July of 2024 Each conversation represents each hero, their story, their area of [00:02:30] expertise. And I thought it was really important for a lot of the new listeners that I anticipate joining the show in the very near future to have a home base, to not have to go searching for the foundation of those modalities.

Chandler Stroud: I really wanted to, again, bring it back to basics and remind us of the foundational nature of all of the approaches that we talk about on the show, and reintroduce the heroes in a way that I think it just felt like the right time, and [00:03:00] especially given the fact that we'll be celebrating our two-year birthday next week, which is crazy.

Chandler Stroud: Very, very excited for that milestone, because this show has become so much more than I ever even imagined or dreamed it would be. I remember pitching the heroes way, way back and just saying to them, "You know, if we can help one woman feel seen and inspire her to go find herself again, that will be a [00:03:30] win."

Chandler Stroud: And now, over 25,000 downloads later, countless conversations, over 100 episodes, industry awards, published articles, like, I'm just... I'm so grateful for the impact that these conversations have had on you, on your friends and family, and for any woman out there who was just looking to feel seen and source a little bit of extra support as she made really [00:04:00] difficult decisions in her own life, whether that be professional in nature or personal, or simply wanting to come home to herself again and not really knowing where to start.

Chandler Stroud: The goal is really to share all of the modalities and approaches that I found helped me arrive at this new version of myself and this incredible life that I get to live, and I really wanted that for other women who I believe constantly work to take [00:04:30] care of everyone else in their life and are going, going, going all day long.

Chandler Stroud: One, because society and culture have demanded that of us, but two, just because we're wired that way, to really put ourselves last. And I think the beauty in these modalities and these conversations with our heroes is they remind us that we need to take care of ourselves and refuel and reset in order to make the kind [00:05:00] of impact that we are looking to have on our families, our friends, and our communities.

Chandler Stroud: And it's so important to remember that, not to sound cliché, but to put on your oxygen mask first. So hopefully, if nothing else, the show has supported you in making those decisions in your own life and inspired you to try some new things. I think healing begins when we get curious about ourselves, and staying open-minded and, again, courageous enough to [00:05:30] peel back those layers and feel through whatever it is that we have not fully addressed from our past is key in moving forward.

Chandler Stroud: And I was so excited to launch the Healing Heroines membership this year because that body of work also represents a space where women can show up fully present in their authentic selves and feel seen and belong in a community of women who are [00:06:00] also trying to find themselves to do this work, but staying really open-minded and curious in the process.

Chandler Stroud: I think if you are looking to make changes in your life and you don't know where to begin, and you want that kind of structured support, but you really want it to be a choose-your-own-adventure and engage in practices that feel authentic to you, I really believe Healing Heroines, the membership, is the answer because that's exactly what it is.

Chandler Stroud: It's scaffolding. It is structure that [00:06:30] teaches you how to take the next step forward but lets you decide what that looks like for you. And so I'm really excited that that extension of the show is there for women wanting to go deeper than what the show in itself offers. So take a look. You can always go to our brand-new website, thehealingheroes.com, to check it out and learn more about all the different ways that you can partner with the brand, with me specifically.

Chandler Stroud: I really want you to feel supported and [00:07:00] seen in whatever it is you are navigating at this moment, and let's figure out what that could look like together So with that, I am so thrilled to be back with a whole brand new season of episodes in celebration of our two-year birthday. I have been busy at the mic recording with some incredible women, incredible heroines that you will hear from throughout the months of July, August, and beyond.

Chandler Stroud: And as a reminder, if you [00:07:30] aren't familiar with our Healing Heroine series, that is essentially conversations beyond those with my heroes, where I interview either women who have worked with my healing heroes, my board of advisors, and have found healing and joy on the other side of that work, or they are women who have faced tragedy, trauma, hardship, illness, and more, but found their own tribe of healers and practices to help them navigate that time in their life [00:08:00] and are now sharing those learnings in a very meaningful way with other women everywhere.

Chandler Stroud: And so I really wanna give them a platform and a voice to tell their own story so that if you are navigating something similar in your own life, you know you're not alone, and you get to be inspired by these incredible women who are thriving on the other side of whatever it is they had to overcome to get there.

Chandler Stroud: And also, the other fun thing that I love about these conversations is oftentimes the [00:08:30] women I'm interviewing share new practices that aren't necessarily represented by my healing heroes. And so it's a great way to learn more about all of the practices and approaches out there that exist for women to tap into, to find presence, to find peace, and to find purpose in their life.

Chandler Stroud: I know I've learned a lot from these heroines, and I just feel so energized and fulfilled by these conversations because you all know I love adding [00:09:00] to my own repertoire, and 2026 has been no different. I have tried so many new modalities this year, and some have stuck. Some, the learnings I've just kept and are ingrained in me, and I will take them with me forever.

Chandler Stroud: And they're all just so beautiful in their own way. And not every single person is gonna resonate with everything we talk about, but that's not what this is about It's about introducing you to what exists so that you can choose what feels [00:09:30] exciting to you. So I hope you'll continue to join us on that journey with all of the new heroines who will be joining us this summer and into the fall.

Chandler Stroud: I'm really looking forward to sharing their stories with you. Next, I wanna share a little bit more about something really personal to me, which is the future of the Healing Heroes brand. This has become a huge part of who I am over the last two years, and I have taken the last three months to really give some thought [00:10:00] to where it's going, how we continue to help women in a really meaningful way, and make sure that we're creating content that resonates and really helps move you forward in your life.

Chandler Stroud: And as part of that process, I really had to reflect on all of the conversations I've had, not just with my heroes, but with my heroines, on my experience guiding the women through the Healing Heroines community in the beta test that we did last year, [00:10:30] the response to all of the materials and content we continue to post in social channels, whether that be Instagram or LinkedIn, and conversations that I've had with many of you in real life.

Chandler Stroud: After reflecting on all of these conversations, I realized there was a singular red thread that connected them all in a really beautiful, deep, and unique way, and that was relationship, but not in the way [00:11:00] that we typically think about it. I've come to believe that to lead a happy, healthy, purpose-driven, and meaningful life, you need three very distinct things to be present in your life, and they are, one, a loving relationship with yourself, two, an authentic relationship with others, and three, a relationship with something bigger [00:11:30] than yourself, something transcendent.

Chandler Stroud: And I've come to believe this not just through these conversations, but something really clicked into place because it helped me realize that this journey I've been on, now a three-year healing journey, that's exactly what I was doing and looking for without even realizing it. And unlocking those three things for me has made all of the difference.

Chandler Stroud: I learned how to love myself again. I [00:12:00] finally found a way to feel truly seen in my authentic self by others, not just my closest group of friends, but also by these women that I've been interviewing. When I say that there is a connection that I now feel to each of these women for c- showing up so vulnerably, so in their power during those conversations, that is something that I hold incredibly close to my heart, and I [00:12:30] do feel connected to these women in a way that is a r- that is really hard to articulate.

Chandler Stroud: And finally, I rediscovered spirituality beyond the definition that I've lived with for so long, which is just showing up in nature and trying to meditate. I found a connection to something so much deeper that unlocked a level of trust not just in the universe and God or Source, whatever you believe in, but also in myself.

Chandler Stroud: Because I [00:13:00] really do believe that God and Source live within us, and we can tap into that kind of spiritual connection by coming home to ourselves, by doing this work to learn to love yourself again. And it was that unlock that helped me realize that is exactly what the Healing Heroes brand has done from the very beginning, just in different parts.

Chandler Stroud: When we talk about mind, body, spirit, I [00:13:30] truly believe that that spirit piece is so often undervalued. I mean, think about modern media and culture today. We talk about the mind and body all the time. I think it's amazing that mental health and finding presence and all of the ways that you need to take care of yourself mentally have come to the surface and are now front and center in so many conversations.

Chandler Stroud: The body- All of these incredible practices, whether it's [00:14:00] resistance and strength training, moving your body, walking more, not pushing and grinding, but listening to your body and finding gentler ways to take care of yourself. All of that I fully support, but I don't hear people talking about the spiritual side of wellness nearly enough.

Chandler Stroud: And if I'm being totally honest, that was one of the most transformative pieces of my entire journey, and I think it's being not just lost in translation, but [00:14:30] being forgotten as part of the conversation. And so I wanna bring it back, and I wanna do it in a way that, again, offers scaffolding for women to find a spiritual life that is meaningful for them without dictating what that should look like, because it's going to be different for everyone.

Chandler Stroud: And it begins by learning to become spiritually connected once again. That's often the first step. [00:15:00] And I think back to my life three years ago when I began this journey before I started the podcast, and I realized I was so spiritually disconnected. A lot of the mind and body symptoms really stemmed from the fact that I had lost myself.

Chandler Stroud: I wanna tell you a story. It's about a birthday party. But not just any birthday party, a version of a party that I found myself at time and time again over many, many [00:15:30] years, different houses, different situations, but ultimately the same party. I was there, my kids were there, other adults were there. There was inevitably a bouncy house, a magician, a piñata, and everyone looked like they were having so much fun And yet I felt completely disconnected.

Chandler Stroud: Not sad, not visibly struggling, just overwhelmed [00:16:00] in a way that I just didn't have words for at the time. I remember tracking my kids across the yard while trying to maintain an adult conversation with a grown-up on my left, all while running through the mental load of what I had to get done either at work or when I got home later that day.

Chandler Stroud: I was exhausted. The best way I can describe it is if you picture a boat anchored somewhere offshore, just drifting away from its anchor. It doesn't sink, it doesn't lose its line, it just [00:16:30] drifts to the edges of where the anchor will let it go. And if you look down long enough, you suddenly look up and realize you've drifted so much farther than you intended to, and the view to the shore looks completely different than it did even five, 10 minutes ago.

Chandler Stroud: You're still tethered. The anchor is still there beneath the surface, exactly where it always was. You've just let out so much line that you've forgotten which direction to pull. That's what those birthday parties were [00:17:00] for me. I wasn't lost. I had just drifted further than I had meant to. But here's what I didn't understand then.

Chandler Stroud: It wasn't just the birthday parties. I was so disconnected from myself spiritually that that showed up in five different ways in my life. The first, I was overwhelmed in a way that had absolutely nothing to do with my to-do list. I was carrying what felt like the invisible weight of everyone else around [00:17:30] me, and I had just convinced myself that that was the cost of being capable Secondly, my body had started talking, and I didn't speak the language.

Chandler Stroud: Digestive issues that I could never explain. Weight I couldn't lose, no matter how hard I tried. Sleep that just never felt like enough. Hormones doing things to my body that nobody warned me about. I kept treating the symptoms like they were the [00:18:00] problem instead of asking my body what it was really trying to say all along.

Chandler Stroud: The third way I knew I had become spiritually disconnected was that I had learned to perform belonging in rooms of women that I actually wanted to know. Laughing at the right times, saying the right things, yet feeling completely unknown in the middle of it all. The fourth symptom that I was experiencing is that I had forgotten how to be moved to tears by [00:18:30] beauty, by music, by a sunset.

Chandler Stroud: I couldn't tell you the last time I had experienced true awe. I felt too serious, like I always needed to be in control. Life had trained that awe right out of me, and I hadn't even noticed it leaving. And the fifth and final way that I knew I was spiritually disconnected is I had built the exact life that I was supposed to want: the job, the home, [00:19:00] the family, the community, and I kept waiting for it to feel like enough.

Chandler Stroud: Five different feelings, one thread running through all of them. I had drifted, not dramatically, not all at once, just slowly and steadily further from my anchor. And I didn't quite know it yet in that moment. I just knew something was off. But I would eventually realize what [00:19:30] had happened and would do something about it, which is why I now have this show.

Chandler Stroud: I have since come to understand what was actually happening. There is a version of you that is fully online, alive in your own life. I didn't have that at the time, and I didn't have the words for why. As I said at the beginning, I've come to believe that we need three things as human beings to lead a [00:20:00] meaningful, fulfilling, and happy life: a loving relationship with yourself, a relationship with others, and a relationship with something bigger than you.

Chandler Stroud: That last one, as I mentioned, is so easy to dismiss. It sounds like a luxury. But Abraham Maslow, the guy who gave us Maslow's hierarchy of needs, believed it was actually the highest level of human development, transcendence. [00:20:30] He even published it the year before he died. It just never made it into the textbooks.

Chandler Stroud: You know the feeling, a concert, a beautiful rainbow or sunset that you didn't expect, that moment where something cracks you open just enough for you to remember that you're part of something so much bigger than your own life. Not a luxury. It is a need, and it is one that most of us are quietly [00:21:00] starving for For most of human history, religion held all three of those relationships for us at once.

Chandler Stroud: It gave you a practice for knowing yourself, whether it through confession, prayer, reflection, or Sabbath. It gave you a room full of people who you could count on to show up every single Sunday, and it pointed you towards something bigger than yourself by design. You [00:21:30] didn't have to find your way into any of those relationships alone.

Chandler Stroud: The structure of religion did it for you. And for many people, that still holds. If your faith community gives you that relationship with yourself, with others, and with something bigger, that is an absolute gift. Keep it. This is not an argument against faith. This is an and, not an or. But a generation of people walked away for reasons that are real and worth honoring.[00:22:00] 

Chandler Stroud: Institutions failed people. Dogma felt like a cage to some, and a lot of people quietly stepped away, carrying a hunger they didn't have a name for. Others, and I was one of these people for a long time, just stopped going because it never really landed with me in the first place, and I had no idea what that absence was quietly costing me.

Chandler Stroud: Into that void came the wellness [00:22:30] industry, and it handed us tools, beautiful tools that we speak about on the show and encourage you to practice and test out in your own life. I have done most of them, as everyone here knows, and they changed my life in miraculous ways. I truly mean that. But many of those tools are solo practices, and when you're done, you close your journal, you roll up your yoga [00:23:00] mat, and you go right back to being that woman at the birthday party, still performing, just slightly more regulated while you do it.

Chandler Stroud: Modern wellness caught some of what people were carrying as they stepped away from these religious spaces. The practices, yes. The self-work, yes. But not the room, not the collective, not the feeling of being a part of something larger than yourself alongside other people. [00:23:30] We are the most well-meditated, most journaled, most therapy-adjacent generation in human history And yet we are so profoundly lonely.

Chandler Stroud: That gap is new, and nothing has filled it yet. The most alive women I know didn't just find the right practice. They found their way back into all three of those relationships, with themselves, with others, and with something [00:24:00] bigger. That gap is new, and nothing has filled it yet until now. That is what I'm building as the third pillar of The Healing Heroes, and I'm really excited to share more with you all very, very soon.

Chandler Stroud: And if you wanna follow along as we progress down that path, I encourage you to follow our Instagram account, which is @wearehealingheroes. You can also follow my personal [00:24:30] account, @chanstroud, where I will be documenting the ins and outs of bringing this next chapter to life for all of you. But I am so moved by what this challenge represents and what this space could be for women who haven't found a way to connect with the divine, with the transcendent, with something bigger than themselves.

Chandler Stroud: Because I promise you, once that connection is made, everything begins to f- [00:25:00] transform in such incredible ways. So today, I wanna leave you with a single question: When was the last time you felt small in the best possible way? If you have to think about that for more than a few seconds, that's not a personal failure or a sign that something is wrong with you.

Chandler Stroud: I stood in a lot of circles for many years looking completely fine, thinking I was completely [00:25:30] fine, and never once asked myself that question. I didn't know I was supposed to. It might just mean you've wandered a little further than you meant to, but the way back exists, and you can always come home.

Chandler Stroud: Thank you for listening, everyone, and with that, remember, be curious, be courageous, and be kind to yourself. You've got [00:26:00] this.