Reclaiming Your Innate Joy by Understanding Qi

What if joy wasn’t something you had to earn — but something you innately possess? Hero and Acupuncturist Jacques Depardieu helps us understand the meaning of Qi, the vital life force energy at the heart of East Asian Medicine and philosophy. Jacques shares how Qi is not something you get more of, but something you remember and embody.

Chandler and Jacques explore how presence, intention, and gratitude help us reconnect to what’s already flowing through us. With warmth, humor, and a little mysticism, Jacques breaks down ancient ideas into everyday wisdom.

What You Will Learn

• [00:08:18] “Qi is not something we have — it’s something we are.”
• [00:14:37] Why practicing gratitude is the first step to shifting into joy
• [00:17:00] How beliefs create emotional experiences that can lead to physical symptoms
• [00:19:30] What happens in the body when you surrender to stillness
• [00:23:30] Why emotional energy is felt before it’s understood cognitively
• [00:26:42] How to describe Qi in a way that goes beyond intellect
• [00:33:30] The subconscious beliefs shaping how we experience everyday life
• [00:36:30] Why reconnecting with joy often begins by remembering what you loved as a kid

Let’s Connect!
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Jacques Depardieu

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Chandler Stroud

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Mixing and editing provided by Next Day Podcast.

Transcript

[00:00:00] Chandler Stroud: Hey guys, it's Chandler and welcome to The Healing Heroes.

I'm Chandler Stroud, an executive wife and busy mom of two who after years of living with anxiety. Health struggles and an unshakeable feeling like I should be happier, made a profound discovery that changed everything. Join me on a journey where unexpected paths lead to healing and more happiness. On this show, we will explore [00:00:30] unconventional ways to unlock more joy in your own life with the help of my very own healers.

And trusted advisors, the healing heroes.

Hey everyone and welcome back to the Healing Heroes Podcast. I'm your host Chandler, and today I'm back with Hero and Acupuncturist. Jacques Dip, someone who has done so much to further [00:01:00] my healing journey and whom today I feel lucky enough to call my friend. He and I always have so much fun together, and we always have these great deep and interesting conversations.

That sometimes go into realms. I don't fully comprehend, but what I love about my discussions with Jacques is that even though I might not fully understand his teachings in the moment, I frequently find myself having these. Aha [00:01:30] moments, weeks or even months later where I think that's what Jacques was trying to explain.

While perhaps I had a general sense of the wisdom he was imparting at the time, it can sometimes feel way over my head until something happens in real life that just makes it click into place and I suddenly have this sense that he's. Further ahead than all of us just way ahead of the game. Knowing this and having [00:02:00] experienced it on multiple occasions, I decided that selfishly, I'd love to learn something from him today that I know very little about relating to how we experience life.

I found myself wondering and often discussing with Jacques. How can I experience more joy just given the demands on my time and everything I feel like needs to get done today? And so in this conversation, I'm gonna ask him to expound [00:02:30] on that topic and explain what QI is for me and all of you listening at the highest level, I know it to be a central concept in traditional Chinese philosophy and medicine.

Often translated as life force or energy flow. Essentially the vital energy that flows through all living things, connecting mind, body, and spirit. That's more of the textbook definition. But if I've learned [00:03:00] anything from Jacques in our many deep conversations together. It often runs much deeper than what we know is true on the surface, and so I'm really excited to dive in and get his experienced perspective on all of this.

Before we jump into our conversation today, let me give a quick refresher on Jacques's background. Jacques Deia is nationally board [00:03:30] certified in acupuncture and traditional Chinese pharmacology and has been practicing for over 25 years. He has a master's in Oriental Medicine and has been a Qigong practitioner and teacher for over 30 years.

He's a self-described advocate of the human spirit having treated thousands of individuals for a wide array of conditions. He understands the role spirit, creativity and spontaneity play in creating health and [00:04:00] recovery. Jacques. Welcome back. I'm so glad you're here. Thank you for joining us today. 

[00:04:06] Jacques Depardieu: Thank you so much.

And I love it. I, and I am your friend. We're friends. Like, but goes without saying. I hope so. Absolutely. And uh, yeah, I appreciate what you shared. And, uh, I think that goes for anyone as far as like there are certain times that in our [00:04:30] lives. Something that we've read or heard comes to us and we reinterpret it in a new, meaningful way.

You know? So you're saying in our conversations, I, I wouldn't say that they're necessarily, I don't think any anything is over your head. I, that's an interesting, that in and of itself, we're not gonna, I'm not gonna distract, I'm gonna, but, but what we, all of us innately. No, and have all [00:05:00] the wisdom required to live a joyful, meaningful life.

But unfortunately, given our circumstances, our our systems, you know, our particular education system, our particular background, and how we grew up, often those things distract us from. Realizing, knowing and then having been supported, that we already hold that knowledge [00:05:30] and that really is what, when you describe Q, you read it definitionally, and that's an important place to start.

The intellect itself, which has developed over time receives those words, which is miraculous. You've read those, right? Somebody wrote that. You read it. And I can understand what you just said, and then I interpret it and then I interpret it in a way [00:06:00] that I can understand, given my education, background, my, uh, idea of what you said, my personal inclinations to what those things meant to me, right?

But no plant, no cat. Need to treat, needs to know what that means. Okay. They might know I haven't had too many chats with them, but you know, I've had some pretty cool chats with all of them actually. [00:06:30] So, uh, I believe that, yeah. But that chat is non, uh, lingua and, and it's, it's, it's more of a love and it's more of a joy chi.

As an idea, right, is this life force energy that animates all living anything that's alive, but the the qi itself is life itself. [00:07:00] So it's not something we have, it's something that we are, we are chi. It's not like, oh, I'm gonna go get some Qi, I'm gonna go get some more chi. 'cause I, I lost some chi, so now I need some more chi.

Right? So that gets complex because in our body, right, we need the air, we breathe, the food we eat. Our organs have to be alive to transform that into life. We have blood within our body, so there are, in [00:07:30] physical reality, there are requirements for us to sustain being alive. And it's hard for us because as soon as I say us, I think of me.

But if I quote unquote die, whatever that means. Physically, my cells are still alive and functioning. I don't know how long for, you know, a week or two or something like that, they're still alive. They're just dying off [00:08:00] because what nurtures and nourishes them, they're gonna run out of, and then we turn into more kind of energy and then that energy goes into the earth if that's how we go or whatever.

But we, we don't like that kind of frame of reference because like we have this idea of. Like my life and not life. And I know the other podcasts that you do touch on this kind of idea that we're not just this physical thing like that, we're not like this thing inside this casing that [00:08:30] like when the casing goes, you know, we're not here anymore.

Right. Because like my experience is that we're more non-physical than physical. That's my understanding. It's my experience. So, so Q is really this vast understanding that like. Everything is interwoven. Everything is interconnected. All life is communicative, all life is regenerative. 

[00:08:59] Chandler Stroud: Can you, [00:09:00] you've, you really have been such a grounding force in my healing journey, and I know we did this in the first episode, but for listeners who maybe aren't as familiar with your work yet, can you share a little bit about your background and what drew you to East Asian Medicine and acupuncture specifically?

[00:09:17] Jacques Depardieu: I have always been interested in what is behind religion, what is behind science, what's behind philosophy. I've always. [00:09:30] Been one of those individuals that was happy and always wanted to have fun. I always want to have fun. I still do, so I always wanted to like have fun and be happy and kind of just live my life and the education process itself.

Is something which, you know, there are things that I really liked. You know, I, I actually was into math for a while, but I really got into, uh, I went to this Jesuit high school. I really got into like a lot of the [00:10:00] philosophies that the Jesuits exposed us to, you know, which was like literally we were reading French existentialism.

We were reading about like atheism, right? So that's kind of cool. It's kind of like we're always living these parallel realities where. What we're interested in and we're desirous of sometimes doesn't exactly work for what is, uh, required of us in our education process. So as I did that. I made my way [00:10:30] through the education process and, uh, at the same time I was teaching sailing all through high school and college.

And, um, instead of doing this PhD program for 10 years, I decided that I wanted to take a break and go sailing. So I got my a hundred ton license and I was running charter boats and an injury that I sustained where I was really, you know, I needed. Told I was going to require surgery, et cetera, led me to getting acupuncture.

When I [00:11:00] got acupuncture, everything clicked and 'cause I not only physically felt better, but my mental and emotional state changed and I. From my background of studies, I said, there's no way that, how could that be? You know? And so then I went to study in, uh uh, we did this on another podcast. We talked about this.

I went to study in China. Now I'm here today sitting here, but simply put, we all have gifts and [00:11:30] we all share them and use them every day. In everything we do. It doesn't matter whether you work in an office, you're a bus driver, it, you know, you're a teacher, you, you work in finance, you're assisting other people in their lives, and we're all cooperating.

So it really is coming to realize that we're choosing what we do every day. That we're choosing how we wanna experience our lives every day. [00:12:00] And that if we do have some kind of focus or desire that our, if we can take our attention and intention and focus it in that way, for instance, being happy or joyful, then we can actually achieve that.

Um, but to do that, we have to. Deconstruct a lot of the beliefs we have about ourselves, about how we got to where we got to, about what's happened to us in the past about present relationships, and that's really where the work [00:12:30] begins. And that's basically what I do at work every day is see the effects of.

People's lives on their physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing, and try to help them realize that their miraculous abilities are always with them and it's actually who they are more than anything else. And activating those, the awareness of those miraculous abilities, puts them into play. And then [00:13:00] our consciousness will gradually shift to understand that, and then we'll embody it.

We'll experience it. You know, I think that's what you've been doing, Chandler. 

[00:13:10] Chandler Stroud: I mean, that was beautifully said and I, I hope that's what I've been doing. It certainly feels like I'm well on my way though. As I always say, healing isn't really a destination, it's a process. So I think I'll be doing it forever, but it's.

Always so much fun when I feel like I've reached new, a new height [00:13:30] of happiness or awareness in my life of how I'm showing up and the choices I am making. To your point, and I love that you, you mentioned that happiness and joy can be a choice. And I think it's something that so many want, but feel. So I don't wanna say out of reach because I do think you can be happy or joyful, but just have this [00:14:00] sense that there's.

A way to go deeper. I mean, that was true for me, right? Like I was a happy person. People would've described me as a happy person. I just knew, like this inner knowing kind of signaled to me that there was more, that there was a new kind of joy that I was missing out on. Mm-hmm. And that's what the journey gave me is the awareness to really experience that.

So how would you suggest women. Like what's the [00:14:30] first step? How do women start shifting or making choices that get them closer to that kind of awareness and joy? 

[00:14:37] Jacques Depardieu: The question really is can we be grateful? Can we see everything that's good in our lives right now, even in difficult situations? Can we find.

Some gratitude. Can we be thankful? 'cause first of all, we're alive, [00:15:00] you know? And we have the ability to continue that life. And we have the ability to change things in our life. But when we are experiencing our lives emotionally in the moment. We take it for granted that everything around us, everything in our lives, is just something that we, you know, that's happening.

And we focus on not like all the [00:15:30] miraculous things about our lives, that we have electricity, that we have running water, that we have shelter. Now we're in a time where that's. Unfortunately, on a daily basis we see those who have a lot worse than that going on, and that's very difficult for us. But also what's really difficult is we've been taught consistently to focus on those things, to constantly focus on our problems, [00:16:00] to constantly focus on what we dislike, and that that kind of creates a certain type of personality.

We all have these personalities where we just want something. We can't get to that something because we have all these other somethings that we have to do. That's just simple. If we're in a relationship, if we have a family, now we're responsible for their joy, for their wellbeing [00:16:30] and, and actually I'm not happy trying to make them happy, you know?

So it's like we gotta kind of clear away. A lot of that, most of these types of, you know, meditations, yoga, Qigong, they're ways for us to become aware. Of an aspect of our consciousness that can choose how we want to experience the moment, and then we can direct that [00:17:00] in a way that we personally would like, which is like, I need to spend more time with my daughter.

Because we're constantly fighting. So how can I work through that? Like I'm gonna stop, I'm gonna see like what it is about me that like having so much difficulty with this, and then I'm gonna try and find out what she's trying to share with me. It has nothing to do with like the [00:17:30] specifics or the content.

It's what's behind that, right? Or like. You know, work is killing me and I can't do this forever and there's no way that I'll be able to do this. But now we have all of these things 'cause I have to pay my mortgage and then now my son, you know, is gonna need to go to a special school or whatever. It's like there are these situations that are created by our beliefs that put us in [00:18:00] unsustainable checkmate situation.

And that leads to mental, physical, and emotional, you know, problems. Now, if you turn that around and start to really be like, okay, I can stop everything in my life and everything will still be okay. Some people, you know, you get the flu, you're in bed for five days, you're not, you know, running around grocery shopping.

How did you get through that? Right. So it's like [00:18:30] we have to start to see like there are ways that we can change our lives in the moment, every moment by seeing what's good, by like realizing that the world is not gonna end if I don't get that delivered, if that doesn't get finished, and then we can start to see that.

We have these little ways of moving forward where we can set small goals, set ourselves in a direction. I think a goal is to just see [00:19:00] that we're creating a lot of our emotionality based on beliefs we have, and if we want to change the way we're experiencing our life, we have to change the beliefs that are behind that.

And then. Akin to that. And that's the acupuncture thing is, is then with acupuncture, you get to experience that because a person comes in and is like, listen, I only have 45 minutes 'cause I gotta, and then it's like, okay, that's cool. And they're like, and you know, can I read or listen to [00:19:30] something while I'm laying here?

'cause like. There's no way I'm gonna lay here for like, you know, 40 minutes. I'm like, well give it a shot, you know? Then boom, I go in there, they're like, can I have another 10 minutes? And then, then afterwards I'm like, okay, what I'd like you to do is think about everything you were thinking about before you came in.

And they try and they're like, it's not having any effect on me. That's right. What changed? You are more in your physical body than in your mind. Your mind is not who you [00:20:00] are, it's part. Of the blessed experience in this life, but there's so much more, and when we can experience that and operate from that place, then you go outside, and I know you've probably had that experience.

I've had it. You go outside and then all of a sudden it's like, oh, okay, that. You, you're dealing with like the grocery store, the pickup of the kid, the fact that the homework was late, [00:20:30] but you're not irritated by it. 'cause you're just like, well, you know, I'm just gonna go get that and I'm actually enjoying myself in the store.

And like everything changed. What changed? Nothing changed except the way that you're experiencing it and the way you're perceiving it change. That's what creates our realities. 

[00:20:46] Chandler Stroud: Well, I love that. That's absolutely been my experience getting acupuncture with you is that it does shift how I approach.

Everything on the other side of that appointment [00:21:00] and the mindset that I bring to it. But I do think, you know, we've talked about energy on the show before and how to kind of control your energy or cultivate the kind of energy that you wanna bring to those situations. To your point, how does q. Play a role in that?

Like how is QI different from the Western definition of energy? And can you just explain it a little bit more? Because [00:21:30] I feel like there's a connective tissue here to what we were talking about at the beginning and what you're suggesting acupuncture can help or assist women to do. 

[00:21:40] Jacques Depardieu: When we are in a certain mindset of, and that energy, right, where we feel like, you know, we're just fighting fatigue or we're just distracted and you know, we meet somebody and it's just hard for us to even tolerate five [00:22:00] minutes of being with them.

And you know, people might say, oh my God, that person's energy is like, oh, I love her energy, right? Yes, yes. Then, then we talk about chi. Now, if we could speak and communicate and understand the Chinese language, then we would see that there's a commonality there. Okay? However, the commonality lies in [00:22:30] emotionality.

What you're really describing is. How you're, you're, you're experiencing your life emotionally and then you're using your. Language to describe a feeling you're getting, which is really a telepathic feeling. That's telepathy. Okay. Of picking up like, which we do every day of picking up like, like how we feel in a space, [00:23:00] how we feel with someone else, how we feel listening to music.

It's all about how we feel. It is not about how we think, but how we think affects how we feel, for sure. How we feel affects how we think. But really it's like, and the, that's what I mean. Women are all, I, we had this conversation before, but I'll just re reiterate a little bit of it. Women are telepathic.[00:23:30] 

They feel. They feel their children's pain. They feel their neighbors like they sense things. This is natural. Males also have these abilities, but often they'll be less inclined to use those attributes and, and in the past they were required. More because people lived [00:24:00] in more with agriculture, with working in nature, with nature.

But we've become, uh, very industrialized and machines don't really require that type of emotional understanding because they're machines. You know, it, it's like you just kind of watch. And you see what people do and what they're attracted to. So the, the idea of [00:24:30] qi, the idea of energy is really translated into how do I feel about whatever it is.

The food, my friend. So you could say like, rotten food has bad chii. Yeah. Like, and a and a bouquet of flowers that's wilted, has no chii. And a freshly cut bouquet has a lot of chii. And then you call that sheen, right? So a little kid that's smiling, you see so much sheen, [00:25:00] so much Qi. And somebody who's unfortunately very ill and elderly, uh, where their eyes almost aren't focusing, there's like no chi.

That's what they mean when they say that. It doesn't mean that that person doesn't have life force energy. It means that that kind of animated spirit is not being projected or communicated in the same way. Right. We've all seen, like you see a little kid that's depressed, it's like the worst thing you can ever [00:25:30] see.

You look in their eyes and that spark is gone. It like breaks my heart. Right? And you know that with your friends. You look at them right off the bat, you're like, boom, right? And you're like, how you doing? They're like, oh, great. And you're like, yeah, right? It's so easy. Everyone knows everybody. Everybody uses q.

Communicates with Q. Everybody knows energy, communicates with energy every single day. They may not be aware of it, [00:26:00] but like, hopefully this conversation makes you realize that you do it all the time. Even when you pull a, a vegetable out of the, you know, refrigerator, you look at the vegetables, chi, and you're like.

That's going to the compost, because that's, that's the, the life force, right? Yeah. You can see, you know, somebody puts a plate of, you smell it, puts a plate at the restaurant in front of you of fish, and you're like, I'm not gonna eat that. It's not fresh, you know. [00:26:30] That's, that's energy. That's Q. 

[00:26:34] Chandler Stroud: So what is your, we read the textbook definition in the intro.

How do you describe Qi If you were teaching it to someone unfamiliar with it? 

[00:26:42] Jacques Depardieu: I would try and assist people to understand that the ability for you to sit here. And understand what I just communicated to you, and then translate that into something [00:27:00] that's meaningful to you is all occurring by the blessed, miraculous abilities that you are and the intellect that you just.

Translated with is only a small portion. Qi doesn't belong to us. We belong to Q. That's really important. Okay. We belong to Qi because the idea of like [00:27:30] we, me speaking like I'm not around. If my body's not here, maybe I don't know, but not in the way that I am right now. Okay. Chi. Experiential. It's a, it's my definition of acupuncture.

Acupuncture assists you to become more aware of your QI and your energy, which is who you are, and that consciousness itself generally doesn't use language. It uses a sense of wellbeing, it uses a sense of purpose. It [00:28:00] has a sense of natural integrity. When we fully experience it, we generally tend to not do things to harm others or ourselves because when we operate from love and care, which is what Nature naturally does, we will not then operate with this type of intentionality.

My understanding is, is generally when we're in conflict. With ourselves, with our beliefs and we hold one type of [00:28:30] emotion for too long, then that will physically manifest as an illness. It'll mentally manifest as thoughts and that will unfortunately drive us to, per perhaps doing things, which, you know, our heart, you know, is against.

And emotionally we experience suffering. So. You know, it's a, it's a, it's, and, and it's really about like when we're joyful, when we're loving, when we feel connected, [00:29:00] like none of those things generally happen to people. They're generally healthy. Their days are good, their relationships are good. You know, it's a lot of work right now though.

Not everybody's on the bandwagon for this, but thank goodness that you're doing these to help people realize that they can ch make that choice. 

[00:29:19] Chandler Stroud: Yeah. Yeah, I mean, that's the whole point. I think it's such a hard thing too, because you know, I always knew there was something awry [00:29:30] like there, as I said in the first episode as well.

I always knew there was more meaning there was something else out there in terms of how I was experiencing life, and I feel so lucky that I had this sense, this pull, that I couldn't explain to peel back the onion and see if I was right, that there was something more for me. But I fear so many women today.

Aren't attuned necessarily to that poll and don't [00:30:00] realize that there is so much more beyond what they've defined as joy in their lives. And I think to what you were saying, I mean that was the whole impetus and aha of the show is that what I was keeping inside, not feeling the beliefs and stories I was telling myself, were creating conflict in my body and showing up in physical.

Illness and form, and I think what was so. Revolutionary and [00:30:30] transformative for me that I'm trying to help other women understand is that a lot of those narratives are subconscious. Often we hold beliefs about ourselves that we are not aware of. I talk all the time about I was this confident executive running a team with this dream job.

I mean, there was no one would point at me and say she really hates herself deep down, but like. Honestly, months into EMDR and a lot of the other practices, acupuncture that helped me become more present, made me aware of those narratives. [00:31:00] And it really has been the most transformative aspect of the journey is to just understand where did these beliefs come from and how can I change them?

And I think that's really been the unlock for me in experiencing a lot of what you're talking about, which is just. Being aware and present and choosing how you wanna show up every day. Choosing what you give your time and attention to, and [00:31:30] being intentional about how you interact with those things versus being reactive or believing that, you know, being 10 minutes late to a soccer game is the end of the world.

Right? And it was really a good shift for me. So, you know, I think what you said really resonates. 

[00:31:52] Jacques Depardieu: It's beautiful. And, uh, that's your story. And your story has, [00:32:00] you can communicate the experiences and the awareness. Your personal awareness has led you to a much vast understanding of life and how you personally wanna live it.

And I do believe, and we know this, we all have friends, they all have different things that they're desirous of that brings them joy. And [00:32:30] this is not about doing one thing in one way. So you get to where we are at, or I get to where you're at and you get to where I'm at. It's about helping people get to where they would like to be with their lives.

Their way that's meaningful to them. That's what I'm all about. And that I think is what you just shared. And it's for those who are interested and that's fine. 'cause you know, [00:33:00] it's like everybody's in a different stuff, but mm-hmm. But I do believe that for those who are interested, who are listening. That they have the right to a joyful life and that they can make choices every day small and big, to make steps towards that choice.

And that the subconscious that you just spoke [00:33:30] about is actually really not. So subconscious, it's something that we can become conscious of if we start to focus on what are the thoughts and feelings we're having about ourselves and about the people around us every day, because those are actually being created.

By us. They're not truths with a capital T. [00:34:00] There are interpretations of the way we feel about things, and if we can find out why we're feeling about it, we might find that we have these beliefs like I. Really don't like to be late because I feel it's disrespectful to others and I just can't understand people who show up an hour late without the thing that I asked them to bring, and they [00:34:30] don't seem to give up B and you know, like what the, and then you're just like, okay, so I have to be.

Authentic to myself. We all cooperate here and it's all about, like you were just describing work and the team and everything. It's all about like how we navigate in our lives from one thing to the next. That leads us, like for [00:35:00] someone else who's basically been, you know, in an ashram, you know, meditating and doing whatever, growing vegetables, like all of a sudden they're like, I need to have a corporate job.

And then they go get a corporate job. Right. You know, and the other person's in a corporate job for 10 years. They're like, I need to freaking go to an ashram. Like, because, like, that's their path, that's their life. So I, I meet everybody every day. I meet [00:35:30] people who come in on their path. I try to understand it and I try to support them.

To become aware that they're on this path and that it's a good path if they wanna see it that way, and that they can choose to. Experience it in a more meaningful, joyful way if they're inclined. And I don't, I don't have to tell them all this kind of stuff or [00:36:00] philosophies. I just, like yesterday, it's like, I just like, what do you like to do?

And she's like, well, my husband likes this and I don't really like that. And I'm like, what do you like to do? She's like, well, I don't really know, like, and then I was like, well, come on. She's like, well, you know, I've always wanted to learn how to paint. And I'm like, oh, that's awesome. So then just take some painting classes.

And then she was like. Big smile. She's like, oh, you know, my friend's doing that, but like it's, I was like, come on, you're gonna join. You know, she's like, yeah, you know? Okay. Now I, that's [00:36:30] I, hundreds, hundreds of patients, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds actually over the years, have. Ben thanked me so much to like, guess what?

I can play the guitar now. Guess what? I like learned how to roller skate. Guess what? I like went and now I can do the climbing gym. You know, like go and do something and then they learn. So it's like you're a kid again. That's the whole idea is [00:37:00] like we're kids right now. Like where did. Life becomes so serious.

Where did everything have to be? And like, you know, Chandler, since you know, I know Chandler, so her children now, and my children are a little bit older, but it's like everything is so serious. Oh, mm. Like soccer. Like your SATs, like your whole life is [00:37:30] dependent upon, you know, and the kids are like, yes.

Versus like, ah, don't worry about it. Fine. You know? So that's not cool for them though, because you want to know why there's so many children who have all these mood disorders and everything. Just imagine you growing up at their age with devices that did nothing. But let you know that the world is basically on the brink of destruction and annihilation, that like every [00:38:00] sport you play, everything you do is so meaningful for your future, on and on and on.

And that the kid who's better than you at it is like gonna go to the school that's better. You know, like how do you handle that? And that's what they're dealing with. You know, or they just put themselves in a thing like, that's not my life. I'll never have that. Like, well, guess what? That's gonna happen to 'em then.

Sad. Right? 

[00:38:23] Chandler Stroud: Yeah. I'm so glad you brought that up because time, I mean, I think the same. [00:38:30] Types of beliefs are inherited no matter what generation. I mean, I think about all of the beliefs that I've had to strip back about people pleasing to be liked and earning my worth through achievement and productivity.

And like that is essentially what we are passing on to our kids in many ways by saying, you know, this is very serious. You've gotta to play really well to get into the best school. And I don't think any parent consciously, you know, says, well, most that I know. And friends with don't [00:39:00] like drill that into their kid.

It's sort of the cultural understanding, right? Even when I scold my kids and tell them, you know, this is really bad behavior, or You're not doing this the right way, I'm so conscious of making sure they understand that they are loved no matter what. And I say to them all the time, just so you know, I don't like what you did here.

I still love you just as much. You do not have to be good to earn my love. I [00:39:30] love you when you're bad. I love you when you're good. I love you no matter what, but I am allowed to be annoyed, frustrated, or disappointed in decisions you make that create these behaviors and 'cause I see it in their face, it's like kids just internalize.

That kind of, you know, being reprimanded or being told like do better as just, they need to be doing something to earn praise or [00:40:00] earn worth. And I guess it just triggers me because I feel like I'm more aware of the many times I felt like that as a kid in 

[00:40:08] Jacques Depardieu: our childhoods, if we're blessed enough to be in a family that.

Gives us love and shares that love, but also teaches us that like, don't put your hand on the stove. It'll burn. Okay? Don't like, do you keep your children at an early age out of harm's way, given their age, given their [00:40:30] circumstances. It's us supporting them to be, if we're blessed enough to be able to create or to find environments where they can grow and thrive with those abilities.

[00:40:41] Chandler Stroud: Do you think that's what's happening with women today? Just kind of going back to what we were talking about. Trying to find their joy. Living in a world where there's endless to-do lists, do you think women are trying to, I don't [00:41:00] wanna say prove themselves, but like be so concerned about all the other players in their lives, like be the best mom, the best wife, the best coworker like you were talking about.

You know, kids being true to themselves and their parents and their teachers. Do you think women in particular just have so many roles to play that focusing on what's right for them is just getting lost in the shuffle? 

[00:41:28] Jacques Depardieu: I [00:41:30] believe that all humans right now are highly aware. How much suffering there is happening and how much difficulty there is, even if our lives are materially wonderful.

And I believe that women are more aware of and operate more from that sense of when things, you know, like when things aren't going well. [00:42:00] For your friend's children, when you see, you know, community struggling, you're affected by it. It affects the way you're experiencing it, and it can unfortunately be so difficult that it's hard for you to perform all these tasks because you're so overwhelmed by this sense of, you know, what your child is going through, what your sister's going through.

What your neighbor's going through [00:42:30] and, and I really believe that that's where the work begins because there's this natural inclination for men and women, but I believe women are more in tune with it to care, to love, to support. And when you feel that you can't do that. Or you're being stopped from doing that, or you can barely even do that for yourself and your family.

That's like [00:43:00] where all of a sudden that negative, those negative belief frameworks come in. Right? So it's really about, um, realizing. For ourselves and for our families and for the community. There's a lot more good happening right now than bad. The world actually is doing really well. People look at the world we're living in, peop there's food in the stores, there're.

Schools, people are communicating. We're [00:43:30] seeing people are focusing on a lot of what's in conflict, but they're not focusing on how much good there is. So look at the good in your day. Look at the good in your community. Look at the good in your home, look at the, and start to feel that, and then start to share that.

And continuously when somebody brings something up that's negative. Try and help them see it or reframe that there's a way that they can see good that they, they, you know, it's changing [00:44:00] that for ourselves. It's sharing different things of how we can see that conflict and adversity can lead us to like a better world.

You know? 'cause when you start to tell somebody that, you start to feel it inside and then it'll become your belief. And once it's your belief, you'll start operating from that place. And there are people like that, right? Yeah. 

[00:44:21] Chandler Stroud: Yeah. No, I totally agree. I totally agree. Well, this has been a great conversation.

I know we're at time, [00:44:30] but just one last question for listeners. If there was one piece of advice or parting wisdom that you would share with our listeners in terms of what you hope they take away from today's conversation, what would it be? 

[00:44:48] Jacques Depardieu: Much of the conversation we've had today is about ways to communicate what we call these ideas of QI or energy, and we really got into [00:45:00] how they apply to us individually and as humans, and really we tried to connect that to this idea of joy, but.

Joy is something that's experienced and it's personal and it's really comes when we feel alive and the love of being alive and the love for [00:45:30] just the senses that we have and when we're in love, you know. Everything turns on that way. Right. And Chandler, you started, before we started recording, you described your experience of walking outside today, where we are in the northeast today.

It's a beautiful day. The weather's been tough. We have this miraculous, beautiful day with clear skies and a fresh breeze and and like [00:46:00] everything is so lush because it's been raining and the birds are chirping. That's it. That's what it's about. It's like becoming aware that we are absolutely connected to, and we can experience this joy of being alive.

And it's, it's, it's like that type of love that we participate in when we experience it, it can be so spiritual that we feel love for everything around us that we, we, [00:46:30] we, we can just. Have this sense of like, my goodness. Now people have these kinds of spiritual experiences where they have to go and you know, they take some type of hallucinogen or they do these types of things, but it's, it's.

Look at a kid, they do that every day. That's what they feel. They're just alive and they, they love like, and they, they're giddy. If they put their hands in the water or they chasing a little duck around on the grass or whatever, it's like, it doesn't, we can [00:47:00] do that too. We can just do that when we like look out the window when we're at the store.

It's, it's, it's like an awakening basically. It's an awakening like Q and energy and all these things are just. Different ways that we can awaken to the joy within us and to like. Feel our connection to everything 

[00:47:21] Chandler Stroud: that's around us. Well said. Thank you so much, Jacque, for the time today. I had so much fun with you as always.

Yeah. I never know where our [00:47:30] conversations are gonna go, but this was a good one. Thank you so much for being here. I 

[00:47:34] Jacques Depardieu: appreciate it. It'll be interesting to listen to because I think so much of what we shared when we're talking is what's behind our words. And, and, um, you know, if we could just someday be able to create these communications that don't have words but are just telepathically communicated [00:48:00] through feelings, you know, then we would really start to begin to understand what's really happening when we're interacting with ourselves and with each other.

[00:48:09] Chandler Stroud: Yeah. I love that. Thank you. Shock. All right, once again for being here. This was fun. Thank and to our listeners, thank you for tuning in. If you enjoyed today's conversation, please share it with friends and remember to follow the show. You can [00:48:30] also visit healing Heroes podcast.com to get resources, meet the heroes, and share your ideas for future episodes.

Thanks for listening, everyone, and until next time, remember, be curious, be courageous, and be kind to yourself. You've got this.